D Day

D for day care that is.

This week is the week that my little Elijah goes into day care for the first time.

I feel sick at the thought of it, but I spent a long time in tears last night because I was so stressed over leaving him for my upcoming exam which is in a month. Lucky for me, I have a wonderful friend watching him in town for the exam, but he's not been left with her before, or anyone really. My sister for a short time. My aunty while I had wedding photos taken, the neighbour while I had an hour break. So I thought it was about time we had a little separation to get him used to trusting other people. Until now it's not been needed. I've always been there and been able to take him places with me. But you can't take a 22 month old to a uni exam.

I mean, I look at him now, walking around with a bucket on his head, and I think he'd be good entertainment at an exam. But no... not possible to take him along.

So Friday I'll leave him at day care.

D day.

Here come the tears again. I know he will be hysterical. I know he will be angry, sad, scared, confused. But I also know it's for the greater good.

If I can get him used to just a couple of hours of being away from me, exams will be easier. Other times when I am forced to leave him, they will be easier also.

Such a hard thing to do, but it's time for us.

Excuse me while I go cry some more.